Look! New TV is on tonight - okay, fine, talk shows, but they’re new. The writer’s strike drags on, but the main talk shows will be back tonight. David Letterman made his deal with the writer’s guild and so will basically go back on the air as usual, but Jay Leno and basically anyone else not under Letterman’s Worldwide Pants is writer-less, which makes me ask what seems to be the obvious question: why bother watching Letterman? You know what you’re going to get there. Every other show is going to be where the fun - and possibly the horrible, awful, cringe-inducing awfulness (and therefore: fun) - is going to be. I mean, what is Jay Leno going to do for his allotted 43 minutes of air time with no pre-written segments? A whole lot of Headlines? Or Jaywalking pieces? Because his interviews are easily the worst part of the show. There’s always been only one reason I tune into Leno and that’s to watch the segment following his terrible monologue - which, on a good night, is something like “things we found on Ebay” or stuff they bought at the dollar store. You know, things that are genuinely funny because he has to rely on the actual items to be funny and not dumb jokes. On a bad night . . . well, it’s pretty dire. Watch the writer-less shows - it’ll be WAY more interesting.

Possibly the highlight of my day - and this may be a bit pathetic, but it is the first day back at work - has been seeing a release date (March 25) for season 3 of Sci-Fi channel’s new incarnation of Battlestar Galactica. As I just started watching season 2 last night, this is good news. If I time it right, I should be able to watch all of that just in time. And for those who, like me, got the BSG movie Razor for Christmas but haven’t seen season 3, it’s apparently safe to go ahead and watch after season 2. The events occur in the timeline following season 2 and before season 3, with what I read is one line of dialog from a season 3 episode appearing in the movie that doesn’t spoil anything and will only function as foreshadowing to those who have no watched season 3. That’s a relief - I was really annoyed at the thought of having to wait until after watching season 3.

Is anyone else not really missing new TV all that much? I know I have a backlog of DVDs to go through, but really, was there that much great stuff on TV to miss? Other than a tiny handful of shows, my schedule has changed only slightly. The networks had better hope most people are not like me - that they’re desperate for their shows to return, or we might all be turning to things they don’t want us to (other cable channels, books, games . . . each other.)

Alright, I admit it, watching anything on the ABC Family channel is lame, but I got stopped while channel-surfing tonight because The Sixth Sense was on and neither Alissa nor I had seen it since it was in theaters. This is what happens when baby goes to bed - the parents veg on the couch in a most potatoey way.

As we were watching, it occured to me that I really don’t remember how the movie ended. And if you haven’t seen the film and don’t want to know the ending, stop reading now - you are hereby forewarned, because I’m giving it all away in about three words now. When he finds out in the end he’s dead, I couldn’t for the life of me figure out what happens next. I know he goes home, sees his wife, and figures it out there, but then . . . what?

Well, thanks to ABC Family channel, I still don’t know! Why? Because those assholes cut the damned movie off after he figures it all out, tells his wife how much he loves her and how in the morning everything will be different, ending the movie abruptly on a shot of the TV on which she had been watching some of their wedding-night video footage. A split second later a miniature version of the credits roll in hyper speed as the rest of the screen is taken up by ABC Family channel-related spam. So if anyone cares to fill me in on the end, please do so in the comments - I know he goes back to see the kid, and there’s a light on the stairs and someone comes to take him up to the light, but I don’t know who and how it happens exactly. I need closure, people. I guess closure isn’t a specialty at ABC Family.

We both thought it was funny that future OC anorexia goddess Mischa Barton played the little girl whose mother eventually killed her by poisoning her food. As I told Alissa, it appears that Mischa may have learned her fear of food in this movie. Now that’s method acting.

We also thought it was humorous that such an intense film was on ABC Family. What followed it? Why that old family favorite, Lethal Weapon! “C’mon, hon, get the kids! It’s time for that movie about a pair cops, one of which pretty much has a suicidal death wish, who fight drug smugglers!”

I’m not a fan of American Idol by any means, but I thought Taylor Hicks was a breath of fresh air just because he wasn’t one of the wailing, caterwauling, warbling, overemotive divas that the show is usually responsible for churning out (this includes the big dude who won a while back whose name I completely forget because he’s done absolutely nothing since winning, while the little pixie Clay Aiken that came in second actually had an entire career since then.) Now, however, thanks to Ford’s ambush marketing campaign, I am eagerly awaiting the day when Taylor Hicks completely disappears.

I almost said “dies” there in place of “completely disappears,” and I have to admit that I really have said it to Alissa and friends numerous times, but I just realized that if he died he’d immediately become a legend and that’s the last thing I want to have happen to Taylor Hicks. No, what I want to have happen to Taylor Hicks because of Ford’s incessant, unstoppable, you-can’t-escape-it ad campaign is for every one of those people who feverishly dialed in week after week to support him or anyone associated with this show to just grow so sick of him that they can’t take it anymore and hopefully they’ll never buy a Ford because of it. Or a Taylor Hicks album.

In case you somehow haven’t seen it - lucky you - the commercial is just Taylor Hicks doing his white-man soul on top of some kind of circular, glowing-blue stage to some song I take it is called “Possibilities.” And there’s some Ford-related stuff in there, too, but following a trend in modern advertising, I truly cannot say what product is actually being advertised other than Ford itself. Brilliant marketing, guys, brilliant. And it plays in nearly every commercial break on every major network, even on many cable networks, and sometimes plays more than once in each commercial break. Its repetitiveness is Chinese water torture - you know it’s coming, you just don’t know exactly when.

I do know this, however: when I hear the opening salvo of horns and drums, I seek the remote control. I cannot take hearing more than a moment of this weak, limp “soul” song anymore. If this song is on Taylor Hicks’ first album, I cannot see how anyone will ever be able to actually stomach listening to it ever again - it has forever been stamped by the 30 seconds of this Ford commercial as a jingle.

Ford has so saturated the airwaves with this ad there is sure to be a backlash, and that backlash will most likely have its most prominent effect on Hicks himself, not Ford. At this point, I don’t care. And Ford doesn’t either - the commercial likely got a lot of viewers to stick around for at least the first few dozen airings because they had to get their groove on to the generic soul while Ford pounded its message into their skulls (which is, apparently, nothing less subtle than, “FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD FORD!”)

This commercial is here to stay for a good long time, I fear, with no abatement of its “every commercial break” schedule in sight. I just wish, if we have to see it so often, it could have been another American Idol - Kelly Clarkson or Carrie Underwood, perhaps. At least they’re cute.

Oh, and Chrysler/Plymouth/Jeep’s Dr. Z: watch out. You’re next. I’m getting real sick of you, too.

You really owe it to yourself to jump over to this post on Blogcritics and scroll down to the comments. Very entertaining - the Soul Patrol has jumped all over this one and they have absolutely no sense of humor whatsoever.

Those of you hopping over here to say hello and point out that the “little pixie” Clay is 6′1″ tall, thank you, but my point still stands - the dude looks like a little pixie regardless of height.

(Forgive me - for two days this went without a title, but now that I think about it, had I titled this when I wrote it, I would not have had the great Bowie song pop into my head, so therefore this is a good thing.)

I was thrilled this morning to find news that the best drama on TV has been renewed - Veronica Mars, a UPN show, will be making the move to the new CW network this fall. You all know I love Lost, but the most satisfying hour of dramatic TV is found in Mars. Of course, it’s one of those shows that is struggling, so I’m asking - begging - for you to check the show’s first season out on DVD and then grab season 2 when it comes out later this summer (or watch it in repeats.) I couldn’t save Arrested Development, but I won’t let that stop me from helping save another great show.

I can’t even begin to go into the show’s storyline - there are many and they all weave together in a pretty spectacular way - but I’ll use Amazon’s synopsis instead:

Veronica Mars had the perfect life at 17, a boyfriend, popularity, and a great family. But it all came crashing down when her best friend, Lilly Kane, was murdered and her dad, the sheriff, accused Lilly’s father of the crime. His accusation cost her dad his job and wife and soon Veronica became an outcast. Now with her dad working as a private investigator, Veronica tries to uncover Neptune’s darkest secrets and who murdered Lilly Kane.

Why is this the best thing on TV? Because it’s written with no fear - unlike Lost, VM’s writers aren’t afraid of giving away some vital clues each week, all the while either deepening the mystery or adding new ones to the list. It’s almost as if the writers see it as a challenge - by revealing some details, they have to add new things to keep up the suspense. In addition, the show is peppered with great lines and witty comebacks - fitting for a PI show, of course - but it’s rooted in pop-culture that rivals only Gilmore Girls. Each week has been rich and fulfilling on every level - I have yet, in two years, to be disappointed with an episode.

Despite how it may sound, being based around a teenage girl, it is not a teen drama, which is made obvious by the fact that teens just aren’t watching it. But adults are - just not enough, yet. And that’s where you come in: watch this show. Just watch it one time. If you like what you see, you can count on the rest to deliver, and if you don’t, you know there’s nothing else there for you. But I’m betting most people who like what I like - what I talk about on this site - will love this show.

It had been lacking for much of the season, but the usual fun and chemistry we’ve enjoyed for years helped open the episode after a glum scene of Lorelai laying on the couch at Sookie’s house, seemingly oblivious to everything around here and absorbed in the drama of her rocky relationship with Luke.

A Friday-night dinner with the elder Gilmores, during which Lorelai’s mother Emily attempts to set up Lorelai’s ex and the father of Rory, Christopher, with the daughter of a family friend, a psychologist, allowed for a healthy dose of the usual Gilmore humor. Rory, who was supposed to be in attendance, instead opted to throw a party for her boyfriend, Logan, who was soon to be off to England to help with his rich father’s newspaper business. This left Lorelai to distract the awkward set-up with her usual cache of ridiculous questions in an attempt to save Christopher from further humiliation.

Emily Gilmore’s attempt to set up Christopher fails miserably, but it provides an opportunity for Lorelai to spill her guts to a qualified professional. And she does so from the backseat of her car, filling her in on the ups and downs of her life with the Gilmores, her brief relationship in her teens with Christopher which resulted in Rory, and the bumpy relationship with Luke, whom she says to her is the only man she ever really loved and that they really belonged together. Luke, who has spent much of the season getting close to a 13 year old daughter he never knew he had until late last year, has put on hold their June wedding and, in doing so, unwittingly put their relationship on hold. The psychologist tells Lorelai that she needs to speak her mind and get what she wants.

And she does - she runs to Luke’s diner and demands that he elope with her that evening, right then and there. Luke, understandably, is confused and thrown off guard by her frantic ultimatum and reacts like most rational people would - he asks that she just calm down and wait. Instead, Lorelai walks away, and when we see her next she’s knocking on Christopher’s door, who takes her in.

We cut to the morning and see Lorelai in bed, under sheets but obviously naked, and Christopher enters the room in a robe. There’s a glimmer of hope that what we’re thinking happened didn’t really happen, but that is dashed when Christopher removes his robe, crawls into bed, and snakes an arm around Lorelai. Staring off screen, she glares with the knowing, weary stare of someone who did something very bad and very stupid.

I have to wonder if departing show creators and writers Amy Sherman-Palladino and her husband had to feel the same way, because with that one move they virtually destroyed any hope for this show functioning next season the way it has in the past - and may have driven off a large number of the show’s fans, many of whom flocked to the internet to discuss and generally diss the season finale.

Oddly, much of the episode’s non-Gilmore related story pertained to the events following town troubadour Grant Lee Phillips‘ “discovery” on the streets of Stars Hollow, and he is whisked away to open up for Neil Young. An onslaught of troubadors descend on the town also hoping to hit it big. Town mayor Taylor Doose has his hands full trying to dissuade the singers off his streets, but as the episode moves on, we see the town square filling up with them, whose numbers are populated by a who’s-who of indie fame from Joe Pernice to Sonic Youth to Yo La Tengo. It was especially thoughtful to give Sam Phillips (who sings all the “la la la” songs sprinkled throughout the show) a special spotlight at the end. It was a nice gesture by the departing Palladino creative team - both to Phillips and fans who expect semi-obscure musical references right and left throughout each episode - but it didn’t really fit in with the episode.

The whole episode seems like it was purposely written by Amy Sherman-Palladino to showcase everything she and her husband had to offer to the show and the network, who are both leaving the show having not convinced the WB to hand over large sums of money and guarantee two more seasons. Insufficiently financially compensated, the Palladinos seem to have set forth determined to put the show on an irreversible path, tacking on a horribly bad ending as if to say “you had all this humor and fun as well as intelligent drama, and now we’re going to leave you with this ‘nearly impossible to make positive next season’ ending! Good luck!”

I found it tremendously insulting – after a season of characters not acting anything like they normally would, they pull the ultimate out-of-character stunt and have Lorelai do exactly what she had scolded Rory for two seasons ago when she up and slept with (and lost her virginity to) then-married ex-boyfriend Dean? After all that emoting to the psychologist about how Luke was the only man she’d ever loved, that she’d never loved Christopher, she runs off and sleeps with him and throws away that relationship she so cherished with Luke? None of this makes any sense - but very little of what the main characters did this season made much sense, either.

Even knowing it was coming, from reading spoilers on the internet, I still found myself amazed at how minimally developed the issue of Lorelai sleeping with Christopher was because nothing in the rest of the show, or even the entire series, would lead you to believe she was capable of doing something that incredibly stupid. They failed to even provide sufficient impetus in this episode alone for her to make a dramatic character shift such as this. Lorelai, always given to impulsive moments, had never done anything quite this wretched, and we weren’t given a suitable build up to make it seem possible.

It’s bad writing to have a main character do something as momentous as cheating without actually showing it happen - it’s a cheap ploy by writers who don’t care to develop a situation and just want the quick shock. While it struck many fans as disingenuous two seasons ago, at least we actually saw Rory give in to Dean’s gross advances. Even though the whole thing was contrived to begin with, it at least had some development. We should have been given scenes with Christopher that made them getting together make sense. But we didn’t. We didn’t get any development that would make this make sense because, given any amount of thought, the twist in the story just would never happen. What we got was a cheap soap opera trick – and that was how we ended the season, on that dreary note.

You can look at it two ways - perhaps it was just time for the Palladinos to move on. They seem to have simply run dry of ideas for the show that didn’t sink into melodrama. Not having the freedom to end the show this season, and I’m guessing not feeling comfortable ending it next season with the events on the show working out as they have lately, they asked for a two season guarantee and a bundle of money to get their creative juices flowing again. They didn’t get it, and so they seem to have sunk the show as a final rude gesture.

But if they were going to stick around with their drought of ideas, then perhaps it’s better they left and handed the reigns to someone else. David Rosenthal is that someone else, and he’s got a huge task on his hands next season figuring out how to right the wrongs that were committed in the finale. The Palladinos may or may not have intentionally dug this show into a hole to spite the WB, but here’s hoping that next season Rosenthal can, as the old saying goes, get the best revenge by doing well.

Saturday Night Live this weekend is actually one you shouldn’t miss, as opposed to the general consensus of just forgetting that SNL even exists this terrible season. Why? Because it’s a clips-show, and those are generally funny, but even more because it’s a “TV Funhouse” ONLY clips-show. Finally SNL and NBC got it through their thick skulls: TV Funhouse is often and almost always lately the highlight of the show. Here’s hoping it makes its way to DVD soon.

Show creator Mitch Hurwitz has officiall announced that he’s done with Arrested Development. I think it’s sad that he’s giving up this easily when he’s probably got the best opportunity to take the show to new heights with Showtime, but I can’t be too surprised - when the only news for two months is that Showtime wants the show badly and Hurwitz is mulling over the deal, it can’t be good.

They went out nearly on top, however, as the final four episodes were the best of the stunted third season. It’s unfortunate that this season worked out the way it did - had they known that they’d only have 13 episodes to work with, they might not have worried about trying to desperately appeal to a wider audience that wouldn’t have them. As it is, season 3 was rough - a frantic, jumbled mess of storylines that struggled to weave themselves together as quickly as possible for some kind of neat ending. As it is, the final five episodes, all written after Fox truncated the season, were back to the quality we fans had come to expect, and the two-hour, four-episode finale was a very satisifying send off.

I just wish it didn’t have to be over. Taste the sad. Can you taste it? I can.

This site says that one of the actors, who isn’t named, has confirmed that Showtime WILL be picking up Arrested Development for 12 episodes. I know - it’s an internet rumor, but the writer is Josh Horowitz, a known TV writer and producer who, according to Penguin Books (for whom he has written a book,) has contributed to “Us Weekly, Entertainment Weekly, and been a producer for Charlie Rose, CNBC, Fox News, and McEnroe.” (He also backs up his claims here.) Kristin at E!, their gossip hound, also confirms that this information is real - but states that her source says that the deal is not yet done, but it’s 50/50 at this point. It certainly wasn’t that just a week ago.

So Friday was it, if you want to be really negative about it - the end of Arrested Development, at least as we know it. If it comes back, it’ll be on another network - ABC or Showtime, the latter being the most likely - and possibly under budget restrictions that may force some significant changes (from a well-founded rumor discussed at unofficial fan-site The OP’s message boards.) It’s very safe to assume that Fox will finally actually cancel the show now that the ratings are in - the 2.0/3 the first hour achieved is absolutely dismal - even worse than usual - especially against the many, many hours-long snooze-fest that is the Olympics opening ceremonies. Even friggin’ Friday Night Smackdown beat Arrested Development. Who knew the show’s viewers were pussies and wrestling fans?

But I’m not going to be completely negative here - Showtime is almost definitely interested in AD, and the decision rests in creator Mitch Hurwitz’s hands at this point. But even if he decides to end it now - and given the three years of misery he’s had to endure to make this show, would you blame him? - the show went out on a very high note with four of the best episodes of the entire stunted third season.

I’m satisfied with the ending - the important loose ends were tied even while leaving some other ones unresolved, and a few possibilities for a continuation were hinted at. So at the moment, I’ll choose to simply look at it like Buster’s fake coma: the show’s “in what we call a light to no coma. In layman’s term, it might be considered a very heavy nap.” Sleep well, Arrested Development.

I know, I know, I’ve been obsessed lately with the sudden death of the best show on TV, period, Arrested Development. Well, here’s some more obsession: a fantastic article from one of the series’ most devoted of the critics, laying it all out - good and bad - about the news. Showtime, if you’re Googling, please note that we are not subscribers currently, but will be immediately if you pick up AD. And, as the writer points out, all is not entirely lost - come spring when Fox is looking at piles of dead, bad shows, they may just give AD another chance. Fingers crossed.

Give me 13 episodes of “Arrested Development” over five years of soul-sucking lameness like “According to Jim” any day.